“Hello, October! Be good to me.” This is what I whispered when I opened my eyes on the morning of October 1. I want to attract more blessings and positivity every month but October is always different. I always have a Love-Hate relationship with October every single year.
First Week
I started my October with another milestone because I received my Social Media In-depth Gold Certificate. I was so happy that I finished the course portfolio on time and started the 4th online course – English for Freelancers with Coach Robbie Lorenzo.
English for Freelancers is my third course with the FVA Academy. I enrolled because I want to improve my grammar and enhance my vocabulary. I need to develop my skill in writing to write engaging blogs and creative copywriting.
I started my month positively. In my heart, I know that this will continue until the month ends. I am keeping my faith to end my Love-Hate relationship with October this year.
Second Week
This Monday morning, I woke up so gloomy. I did not know the reason why. I reached for my phone to see what time it was then I saw a message from my client. It was sent 2:00 in the morning. I opened it and it read: “… I no longer need your Virtual Assistance Services.”
I was bewildered and tears ran down my eyes. I was lost for words and stared at her message for about 30 minutes. When I finally got the courage to compose my message, I said “I understand. When is my last day?” “Today is your last day. Thank you for your services,” she replied.
We exchanged kind words and she promised to send me a great review. However, I still felt sad and depressed because she was my first client and I pictured myself working with her for a long time. I even planned out and prepared for her a one-month content for her Instagram Account.
Questions that popped into my mind: Why so sudden? Did I make a mistake? Did I offend her in some ways? I just could not figure out what I did or Am I just overthinking this situation?
I could not handle bad news this early and on a Monday! Of all the days, why Monday? There is a saying that goes if you want to start a great week, start your Monday right!
I am trying to be optimistic. On the other hand, I could not carry out any chores. I decided to sleep on it. When I woke up, I felt that I needed to do something to ease my mind so I organized and arranged my work portfolios and I sent multiple applications to all Freelancing Platforms.
Mid of Second Week
I had an asthma attack that started with allergic rhinitis. It developed into coughing with body malaise. These are some of the signs and symptoms of the Corona Virus. I did not panic but instead I solemnly prayed to God that I not lose my sense of taste and appetite and my sickness does not worsen.
My Mom demanded to rush me to the hospital. I refused. I know this is not Corona Virus because my appetite and taste are still intact and I am craving for a donut and mi Goreng. These are great signs.
I told her that hilot (folk massage) is what my body needs to ease my body malaise and to prevent it from worsening. I also drank some natural home remedies like pure calamansi juice and ginger tea. I felt better after a day or two. Thank you, God!
Second Week (Weekend)
That Saturday, I got invited by my friends to hang out for a few hours. I did not hesitate and immediately said yes. I have not seen them since lockdown and I honestly wanted to go out.
When we arrived at our meeting place, I was going to message my other friend to order food for takeout. I noticed that my phone screen was blacked out and could not open it. I asked my friend to dial my number to check if it is still working. To our surprise, it rang.
The phone is working except for the screen. The breakdown was unexpected. Why is this happening to me? Why now? I need my smartphone for emails and I have lots of files in there too.
OMFG, October! I undoubtedly hate you!
Third Week
My mom was scheduled for a medical check-up. We went to the doctor’s clinic right after we picked up the CT scan result. I came with her to show my support and to know the findings first hand.
I was sitting beside her when the doctor told her she needed an operation, ASAP. Her Doctor was very direct in delivering the news. She was startled; I was speechless. He suspected that the mass is inside her ovaries because she has healthy liver and kidneys.
My mom was concerned with the operation cost and asked her doctor. The doctor just smiled and did not answer. Instead, he referred us to his gynecologist/oncologist friend and Mom was scheduled to see the doctor the next day.
The gynecologist said the same thing. She needs an operation right away. Imagine the size of a volleyball ball, that is how large the mass is inside her. He also told us how much the surgery would cost. It is important that we collect funds for her operation to happen soonest.
It was bad timing to lose a client when my mom is required to have a surgery. I want to help but am financially unable. I did not know how. I felt useless. I was so frustrated that I have been crying every night since then.
Emotional support is not enough. Money is what we need.
Fourth Week
I got invited to be part of my childhood friend’s birthday trip with her sister. One of our couple friends also joined us. The celebrant booked a cabin at Kwentong Dagat in San Felipe, Zambales.
It was a beautiful place but it made me aware I had no camera. I also could not post on social media. With no choice but to make do with what I have and what is around me, I began to appreciate the timeout.
I was able to unwind. My friends and I became even more close. We bonded. So see, I enjoyed my stay because I had no phone with me.
This trip helped me to recharge my soul and put my mind at ease. I even came up with this this topic for my blog.
So did I have a Love or a Hate relationship with October this time?
Insights gained
As I was weighing the happenings, I had some realizations.
For every hate moment we experience. there is a loving moment waiting to be noticed at the corner. Always look to the bright side of everything and stay optimistic all the time.
Believe in yourself that you can surpass everything. God will not give us a hate moment if we could not handle it. He may be just testing our ability to handle difficult problems and wants us to see how strong we are.
Solemnly Pray. Prayers can move mountains. God hears every single prayer from us. It may take time but he always answers at the right moment. He is always there watching and guiding us from above.
Always be thankful. Hate or Love, say thanks anyway. Charge it all to experience. You have nothing to lose. You might even gain lessons out of it.
“Tough times never last, but tough people do.” – Dr. Robert Schuller